How do you find your own niche when you mind is like jelly that things just take over. When i read novels with a good first person narrative i end up thinking in the characters language like when i read godamn catcher in the rye, holden took over my brain. So when you are attempting to write this thing everything comes from these things your reading and you become a little charctriture of the text you were in. So my mind is so fucking sticky i can't separate myself from other peoples words sometimes and i guess i'm a relatively impressionable 19 year old that is searching for something to grab onto.
i' glad i haven't grabbed onto modernism as some kind of mind-blowing religion but lets not get into that right now.
It's like you do have to write this kind of stuff in a blog in in an email because it feels like all t he inbetween bits that should be making up my manifesto, like the writing does not seem important or cohesive enough to me to put in a manifesto but it feels like the meat that is in the whole stew of it.
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